Friday 17 January 2014

The Missing Link!

SORT YOUR LIFE OUT . COM
We need a manager. Or a PA. Or personal organiser. Someone who's in charge of the diary and bookings and planning and organising. All those fiddly bits. Someone who knows all five of our personal diaries inside out and thus can plan the band's activities accordingly. At the moment that someone is me. And after only 3 weeks, this year is already a logistical nightmare. All the festival negotiations have started and I just can't keep up; it's mayhem! Port Eliot Literary Festival is confirmed. That I do know. I must put that in the diary. But where's the diary? Ah, this scrap of paper will do! Scribble Scribble scribble...

Brrrrrring Brrrrrring! 

'Yes, hello Warwick Folk Festival! How lovely to hear from you! Yes of course we're free, I'm looking in the diary now and it's empty in July! Yes, we'd love to play!' So that's Warwick confirmed now too. Brilliant. I'll just write that down; Friday the 25th at 8pm, The Moon Stage. 

"Hi guys, just to let you know we've got Warwick on July 25th now!"
"Can't do it." says the drummer.
"What, why?"
"Cause we're playing at Port Eliot that day you numpty!"
"Ah, balls! I forgot!"

But the diary was empty!? - Well of course the diary was empty, you wrote it on a scrap of paper!

And then I'm cancelling Warwick and accepting Clovelly, but that's the same weekend as Latitude, but they haven't confirmed yet, and the drummer's away in America that week, and the guitar player starts his job with direct line that day. And then there's Beautiful Days Festival and they want another promo pack asap cause they lost the last one. And then so and so wants us to play at their wedding in the arse end of nowhere and then that Arts Centre chap keeps asking me about dates in April, and the Silk and Skin Festival (god knows what that is!) they want us that weekend? Or was it that weekend? Where's the diary! My head's spinning. I'm searching the bin for scraps of paper with important information on while trying to design a promo pack and book a rehearsal room and eat my lunch! Then I realise I haven't got any money and I need to work too! 

But it is exciting; already this year is shaping up nicely, we're realising our film, How NOT to be in a band; a documentary about our three wknd tour last september, made by our friend the filmmaker Paul Mackeson, who followed us up to Derbyshire and back. We've hired a lovely independent cinema in Bristol and after only a week of double booking ourselves, finally settled on a date; Friday March 14th. We're shooting another music video soon. We've even started writing new material for the first time in a long time! And we've got some cash in the kitty for the first time in forever! CD sales are up. The mandolin's got a new pickup and we fixed the bass amp. The piano player's given up with his side project and we're all getting on! And, after the summer's festivities have died down, we are planning our first foray into Europe; a tour of France, Belgium, Holland and Germany. World domination beckons... again!


We're in a good place. We're all focused and happy. Opportunities are arising. I've a feeling this will be a very good year. We just need a Personal Organiser. Someone who knows the drummer's unavailability and when the bass player is walking in the Lake District. Someone who knows the guitar player's knee appointment and that the piano player has lost his bank card for the 5th time in a year and is now being charged by the bank for a new one! 

The missing link. The knowledge. The diary. With a pencil and an ink. Who knows the yes's, the no's and the maybe's. Who understands budget and travel and route. Who says please and thank you and kind regards. And doesn't write important information on cereal boxes. 

Someone like... Mother!

Brrrrrring Brrrrrring!

"Hi darling, what's up?"
"Can you be our manager?"

www.theoddfolk.com


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